


Looking for Moony

by CanineCupid (secret_murmurs)



Series: Marauders Last Words Soulmark AU [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: #RSCandyHearts, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bisexual Remus Lupin, Domestic Fluff, Drama, Drama & Romance, Eventual Happy Ending, Feelings Realization, Fluff and Angst, Gay Character, Gay Male Character, Gay Remus Lupin, Gay Sirius Black, Getting Together, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), POV Sirius Black, Pining, Pining Sirius Black, Post-Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Pre-Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Pre-Slash, Romance, Sirius Black as Padfoot, Slash, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, alternative universe, but they lived happily ever after
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-12 15:09:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29386800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/secret_murmurs/pseuds/CanineCupid
Summary: Soulmate AU: The last words your soulmate will ever say to you appear somewhere on your body.Prompt was 'Ever Yours' from the RS Candy Hearts challenge. Thanks to @goodboylupin for this.https://goodboylupin.tumblr.com/
Relationships: Sirius Black & Remus Lupin, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: Marauders Last Words Soulmark AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2192466
Comments: 2
Kudos: 46
Collections: The Candy Hearts Challenge, Wolfstar Love Letter Challenge 2021





	Looking for Moony

  
When he was stuck in the closet, Sirius liked to stare at his marking. 

> _Ever Yours,_  
>  _Moony_

His soulmate, it seemed, would call him Moony. But he was the one who liked nicknaming. Maybe his soulmate would write him after he died. No, too sad. Maybe it was a promise to follow him into the afterlife. (He couldn't stand the idea of dying before her.)

Even when the marking faded into the darkness, the words stayed behind his eyelids. Lost in his wonderful future, sleep washed over him, taking him to a place that wasn’t cold and hungry and lonely… 

  
***

  
Sirius liked school. Detention had nothing on his parent’s punishments. And he’d hardly gotten on the train before meeting his platonic soulmate.

But no one called him Moony. And there wasn't a girl called Moony at school—not even a Slytherin. He’d checked, from the school's founding until the roster of future students. No boys called Moony either.

And no evidence of anyone with that nickname.

He’d acquired the Illevermory and Beaubaxtons records too, from a strangely-amused Headmaster.

"You done yet?" said Remus, rolling his eyes before looking out the window again. "I've got to go...visit my mum soon."

"Again? Really, Rem, couldn't you take the month off?"

Amber eyes widened, and Remus blanched.

"The month?!” 

"The year would be better... But at least this time. Please, Remmie? You look pale as a Professor Binns."

He turned to face—an empty chair, and a figure shrinking into the distance. 

“Sheesh, Lupin,” he said to himself, not sure why it bothered him so much.

They didn’t see each other for a week.

  
***

  
For some reason, McGonagell let James and Peter leave class. And he wasn't going to be left behind. 

He followed. But instead of going to the Honeyduke's tunnel or something, they skulked into the Infirmary to a little kid with more scars than he'd ever seen. Poor kid looked lucky to not have died from the carnage. Poor...

"REMUS?!"

"Shh!"

"Bloody hell, what happened?"

"Mr. Lupin,"—Pomfrey unwound a bright red bandage—”was attacked by a wild animal—"

"When?"

"—while walking to Hogsmeade to visit home."

"How could you let this happen!" He pointed at her. "Aren't _YOU_ supposed to protect us!"

"Excuse me!" Pomfrey huffed. "That's quite enough."

"Jamie, Pete, aren't you going to say anything?"

"Uh..."

James put an arm around Sirius and pointed to the bed.

"Let's talk when he's better?"

Sirius sighed and sat back on the edge of the bed, waiting for him to wake up. He looked so peaceful, almost angelic…

  
The night Remus returned to the dorm, they talked.

"Of course I don't _mind_ , you prat.” Sirius wiped off tears streaming down Remus’ cheeks and hugged him. “What do you take me for, a _Black_?"

Remus laughed.

“No—only a force of mayhem.”

"And you're harmless."

"I'm not."

"You're too small anyway!" Sirius laughed, rolling over Remus and pushing him down. It felt funny inside. Was it weird for Sirius to enjoy this? No, another thought... "Hey, you need a new nickname!"

“Hmm…”

“I know!” said James, jumping between them on the bed. “I now declare you...Moony!”

Oh, Merlin. Sirius’ heartbeat pummelled wildly. Suppressing thoughts was one thing, but the marking… It couldn’t be.

Sirius looked up.

A blanched Remus like he’d be sick. But he still looked handsome… 

"Don't you like it, Moony?" asked Peter, shattering the moment.

"I really don't."

"What would you prefer?"

Remus and Peter traded unreadable looks. 

"Literally anything else. Please."

"Is it really that bad?" said Sirius, tugging at his tucked shirt tail. He’d say something. "You've been called worse."

"By _you_." James looked down at him like a grouchy McGonagell.

"I said sorry! Loopy's not that bad. Now we know why you always fall asleep in class."

"If he says he doesn't like it, then he doesn't like it, Black." James stood in his face, arms crossed. "What's it to you?"

Sirius pulled his shirt back down.

"Nothing... Whatever you want, Remus."

And the subject was forgotten.  
  


***

The more he thought about it, the more sense it made. James was him, but better. James came from a nice family, he from the cruelest. James was leader, he followed. James was patient, he yelled. James was better at Quidditch, better at school, better at anything that mattered. 

Of course Remus' soulmate was James. 

Or Peter? Their friend was chubby, sure, but also sweet, generous, and trustworthy. They shared a love for sweets and board games. And the first animagus had been a rat, followed by a stag. 

When they unveiled their forms, Remus decided to nickname them. And now that he wasn't the only one with an animal nickname, suddenly he liked being called Moony. 

Unless Sirius tried to.

James would say only animagi get to say that. But it had never been a rule before. And somehow this felt more personal, even if no one else in the world got to say ‘Moony’ either. Everything felt more personal with Remus.

But Remus would be better off with one of them anyway. He deserved the best. It only hurt more, though, for Remus to go fall for a male friend after all—just not him. Probably because he was as useless and unloveable as his family always said.

"Sirius? Black? Oy, you wanker!” A hand waved in front of his nose, then returned to ruffle a mess of black hair. “You going to say anything?"

"What?"

"One of your best mates just said he might be gay. And thinks you hate him. Now would be a good time to fix that."

"Of course I don't mind. I always figured you were."

"What?!” Remus sputtered.

"Just thought you'd have better taste, Moony."

Peter patted Remus awkwardly.

"I'm sure whoever you fancy is fine."

"Of course _you_ are."

"Don't be an arse. There's nothing wrong with being a queer. Accept him as he is."

"I do! Be kind of hypocritical if I didn't.”

Three gaping mouths stared at him.

“ _Shite_!"

He fled.

  
An hour later, a breathless Remus appeared in his sulking corner—clutching a box of chocolates, of course.

"So...you're...you know?"

Sirius turned to face the window, trying not to admire Remus’ reflection.

"A queer, homosexual, shirt-lifting faggot? Yes." Sirius pulled out another cigarette. (A sure Remus-repellent—he hated Sirius’ 'nasty Muggle habit' even more than his mum.) "Any more questions, Lupin?"

"Just one..."

"Well?” Sirius sneered. “I haven't got all day." (Utter bollocks, but he couldn’t hear who Remus fancied right now.)

"What does your marking say? I know you've got one."

Sirius puffed some extra smoke out.

"Mind your own fucking business."

"Sure you’ve not mixed it up with Prongs’?" Remus chuckled, plucked the cigarette from his fingers, replaced it with a chocolate. "No names, then?"

"Oh, just bugger off!"

"You idiot..."—Remus shook his head—"why'd you think I don't let you call me Moony like the others?"

"Am I supposed to guess why you hate me?"

"I don't. I just don't want to think of you dying. And that I'd miss it"—his voice softened into a whisper—"I know you're afraid of that, for some reason."

"So, it's to make sure I'm not your soulmate?"

"Because I don't fancy them."

"Oh, REALLY? That mark on your chest says otherwise. Unless you'll let others call you Moony too."

"You can."

"Really?"

"Yes, if its really such a big deal. Just not at the end of a sentence."

"Thank...huh?" He turned so they faced each other. "Wait..."

"Figured it out, huh?" whispered Remus, looking down at his shuffling feet. "You'd be the last, again."

Remus pulled up his shirt to reveal a mark.

> MOONY!

"Sirius, you did it! Merlin, you're an animagus."

Running into his friend's arms, the dog's tongue lolled and licked the squirmy, lanky boy under him.

"I'm calling you Padfoot."

He pranced a circle around him before leaping back into the human and throwing his arms around him.

"Only if I get to call you—"

"Moony, yes, you can—"

"—love."

"You...?"

"Yes. Now who's last?"

If Peter wondered why Remus was snogging a dog called Padfoot, he didn't say.

***

They lived happily. Years passed fast.

***

  
Thunder cracked. 

Whimpering, the dog curled up tighter against the stone. Stone was safe. Stone was home. Stone was his. It even said his name.

> REMUS JOHN LUPIN  
>  _1960-2020_  
>  The best of humanity.  
>  Advocate for werewolves, gay rights, and education  
>  Survived by his grandchildren, children, husband and dog, Padfoot

(The dog did not wonder why it could read.)

Padfoot would protect stone, no matter what squirrels and rattly stinky machines tried. No matter how cold and dark and hungry...

  
Finally, one day, the dog was tired. His limbs ached when he chased squirrels and crunchy leaves and his tail. He couldn't remember anything anymore, except running in the forest with the other dog. He forgot the other dog's name. He forgot his own shape. 

A large, flying feather creature fluttered overhead. He swiped at it absently with his paw—or was it a hand? The paper smelled like...home? woods? big furry dog friend?

> _My Dear Padfoot,_
> 
> _I don't know what shape this letter will find you in, but I had to at least try to defy fate. This way, I can be here for you before you die, even though I probably committed the unforgivable act of beating you to it. I hope you can forgive me, and let me make it up to you afterward (winks). Know I'll always love you and wait for you, pet._
> 
> _Ever yours,_  
>  _Moony_

  
Padfoot didn't understand. But he could practically hear the voice of the one who licked him clean.

His tail wagged, and he sniffed. 

He couldn't smell sometimes-furry friend anywhere. Just sharp smells poking his nose, of metal and medicine and bathtubs.

But he would look everywhere for friend. Friend, called:

" _MOONY!_ " 

There was a beeping noise as he leapt up to greet the friend, who looked younger than he expected. 

The friend chuckled.

"Welcome home, you mutt."

He ran toward the open arms, lighter, freer than ever...

_THE END_

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked this, find me on [tumblr](https://secret-murmurs.tumblr.com/).


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